Sometimes, a spouse can be a bit selfish. They may have the tendency to only think about themselves and not what their partner is going through. These letter samples are for all the “selfish husbands” out there.
Letter To Selfish Husband
To my selfish husband,
I don’t know why you are who you are. Why you have made the choices that you have made, but I will tell you this, it is not okay. It is not okay for you to act like such a jerk all the time.
You are married to me and I have always been there for you when everyone else was not. When we first met, I was so excited because finally someone wanted to spend time with me. And then once we started dating and got married, it became clear that we did not want the same things out of life or marriage. You wanted to work hard at a job that didn’t pay well so that we could eventually move away from your hometown and start a new life in another state where there were better paying jobs available (which turned out to be true). But what about me? What about my dreams? What about the dream of having children one day? Instead I had to settle for staying here in our hometown while you went off on your own adventure without me.
It’s not fair that I should have to stay here while you go off living your life without me when we’re supposed to be doing this together!
Dear Husband,
I am writing to you because I need to tell you something. I love you and I would like for us to continue our marriage, but I don’t think we can do it unless there is some change. The problem is that you are selfish and have no regard for my feelings.
I am not complaining about things that happened before we were married or even after the wedding ceremony. I am talking about what has been going on in the last year or so and it is getting worse. You have taken over everything in the house and make me feel like an outsider when I come home from work or from visiting friends or family. You have even taken over my workspace at home as well as our bedroom and bathroom!
You also take over all of our finances so much that there is nothing left for me.
Dear husband,
I have a complaint. You are a selfish man, and I am tired of it. I have been married to you for 10 years now, and we have three beautiful children together. But I feel like you only see me as someone who takes care of the kids, cooks and cleans up after you.
You don’t seem to be interested in my life anymore. We hardly talk during the day, because you spend all your time at work or playing games on your phone. You never take care of anything around the house, even though I ask you to help me every day.
I used to think that once our kids were grown up and had left home, we would have more time together as a couple again. For now though, we don’t even spend any time alone together anymore! So what’s the point?
Dear selfish husband,
I am writing this letter to you with a heavy heart. I don’t know what is going through your mind and why you are making such a stupid decision. I know it’s been a long time and we have been through ups and downs but I still love you and would never leave you for another man.
You claim that our marriage is not working out anymore and that I am the reason for it all. You say that I am not caring enough or loving enough to make you happy anymore. You also say that it’s my fault because I don’t take care of our children properly.
I am sorry if this hurts you but this is not true at all! There are no reasons why I should leave my family behind just because of your selfishness! It’s unfair on my part! What about our children? What about me?
I feel sad when you keep on saying that I am not good enough for you anymore! But then again, maybe it’s me who has changed over time… Maybe I have become more mature now… Maybe it’s time for us to move on with our lives in separate ways.
My dear husband,
I know this is a difficult time for us. Our marriage has been on the rocks for a while now, and it’s hard to say what caused it. Maybe it’s your selfishness, or maybe it’s my own. But I’ve decided to let you go. I’ve moved on to someone who will appreciate me and make me happy, like you never did.
I know this may seem sudden, but I’ve thought about it long and hard. You’ve never been there for me when I needed you most — after the miscarriage, when our son was born, even when I was diagnosed with cancer. What kind of man does that? A selfish one like you!
Dear Hubby,
I know that you are a selfish man. I have been married to you for fifty years, and I have seen you become more and more selfish as time passes.
You don’t care about me anymore. You don’t care about our children or grandchildren. All you care about is yourself! You are so self-centered that you won’t even help me with the chores around the house or help me cook dinner.
You just sit on the couch all day watching TV while I work myself to death trying to keep up with everything around here. I cook, clean, do laundry and take care of your needs all by myself while you sit back and relax doing nothing! It’s not fair at all!
I am so tired of working hard while my husband sits around doing nothing but wasting my money on stupid things like beer and cigarettes. Do you realize how much money we could save if we just stopped spending so much money on useless stuff? We would be able to pay off our debts faster and have more money in our bank account instead of relying on credit cards to buy groceries every week!
Dear Husband,
I’m so sorry to have to write you this letter. I know that it’s not easy to hear, but I’m afraid that our relationship is over.
We’ve been together for over ten years now and I have loved every moment of it, but things have changed. You used to be such a wonderful boyfriend, husband and father. You used to be the most amazing man in the world – until recently.
I don’t know what happened or when it happened, but something did go wrong between us. You seem to have forgotten all about me and our children recently. It’s like we are not even a part of your life anymore because you spend all your time with your friends or at work instead of being with us!
It hurts me so much when I see how much time you spend doing things that don’t matter in the grand scheme of things like watching TV shows or playing games on your phone instead of spending time with us as a family!
You used to love spending time with us when we were younger – why can’t you do that anymore? Why can’t you just put down your phone once in a while so that we can talk about something other than what’s happening on Facebook or Twitter?
Dear Husband,
I have to be honest with you, I’m not happy. Not because you don’t provide for me, not because we don’t have a good relationship and not even because of the lack of intimacy in our marriage. The reason why I’m not happy is because I feel like you are taking advantage of me.
I know this may sound harsh but hear me out. The reason why I say this is because every time we go out on dates you don’t pay for anything. The last time we went out, it was my birthday and you still didn’t pay for anything! Also, when we go shopping together, you always end up getting something while I just look around the store trying to find something that I like. And the biggest evidence of all is when we go grocery shopping together; I always end up carrying all the bags while you do nothing but complain about how heavy they are!
I hope this doesn’t come across as harsh but you have become very selfish. My point is that if you want our marriage to work then please start treating me like an equal partner instead of taking advantage of me all the time!
Dear selfish husband,
I love you. You are my husband, and I chose to marry you. I chose to spend the rest of my life with you. However, I can no longer be with someone who is so selfish and unappreciative of me. It is not easy being married to someone who is only thinking about himself and not giving a damn about his family or the people around him.
You have been acting like an immature child for a long time now, but lately it has gotten worse. You think that because we have been together for so long things should just be handed to you on a silver platter just because I have put up with your crap for so many years. Well guess what? You’re wrong!
I am sick and tired of being treated like a doormat by you! I am not your maid or your assistant or your slave! I am your wife! We made vows that we would stand by each other through thick times as well as thin times, but clearly those vows mean nothing to you since you treat me like dirt all the time!
I want out of this marriage ASAP!
Dear Husband,
I have written this letter with a heavy heart, but it is time for me to put my foot down and draw a line in the sand.
You are selfish and inconsiderate, and you have no idea how much it hurts me and our family when you act this way. Your actions are affecting our children’s lives too.
We need help. We need counseling, because the situation has gone on too long and gotten out of hand. If you don’t want to go to counseling or therapy (which I think would be good for all of us), then at least get some reading material so you can learn what you are doing wrong!
I know that we both love each other very much, but I am tired of having to remind myself that I love you because sometimes it doesn’t seem like it anymore when we argue over stupid things that don’t even matter half as much as they should.
Dear Husband,
I am writing to you because I feel that it is time I spoke openly with you about some of the things you do that are hurtful and make me very unhappy.
For a number of years now, I have been feeling dissatisfied with our relationship. Some of my friends say it is because I am not fulfilled sexually. But this is not true. It goes deeper than that.
You seem to think that our marriage is like a business deal and that we should both be out for ourselves and our own interests without regard for each other’s feelings or needs. You never ask me what I want or need, but only tell me what you think I should have or must do — even when it’s wrong!
You think everything should be done your way; when anyone disagrees with you, they’re wrong! This attitude isn’t fair or right — especially in a marriage where two people should be working together as partners, sharing responsibilities as well as decisions and feelings.
Also See: Open Letter To The Man Who Stopped Loving Me
